By Christy Whitman and Rebecca Grado
If there is one thing that makes an Alpha Bitch bare her teeth, it's competition. In fact, nothing gets this woman's juices flowing more than hearing about the accomplishments or acquisitions of another female. She seems to have 20/20 peripheral vision because she’s constantly looking over her shoulder to see who is doing what and who might be poised to outdo her in some way.
In the book, Taming Your Alpha Bitch: How to be Fierce and Feminine (and get everything you want!) Rebecca Grado and Christy Whitman call this gal a “Competitive Alpha”-- one of the four characteristics that define an Alpha Bitch.
When a Competitive Alpha perceives herself as being in the lead, she feels smug and energized. But when she finds herself coming up short next to her competitors, she is likely to become withdrawn or depressed or even lash out in a jealous rage. She also might find herself going into overdrive to out do and out perform her friends, co-workers, siblings, and neighbors.
Life for this woman is a perpetual game, and she is obsessed with keeping score. She has to prove that she is the best at everything, from the shape of her body to the size of her diamond ring. Only after she has made it clear that she's the one with the more successful husband, the bigger home, or the most perfect Downward Facing Dog pose does she feel content.
At work, her competitive drive comes out in full force. After all, business is one area that celebrates a competition. But when that tenacity turns into obsession, her fierce competitive nature may steer her straight off the cliff. That’s because she’s neither afraid of doing whatever it takes to advance, nor is she apologetic either. She can be ruthless and more destructive than beneficial.
Even in her intimate relationships, she may feel the need to outshine her partner. She’ll talk over him, finish telling his stories, and make sure that she gets the loudest laughs and the most attention. Rather than encouraging her partner or celebrating his victories, his successes quickly become fuel for her “out-do-him-at-all-costs” attitude.
As a mother, she will make certain that her children are front and center, all the time! And she just loves to constantly brag about her kids’ accomplishments to anyone who will listen—and to those who would rather not!
Among her friends, the Competitive Alpha’s behaviors are notorious. Just tune in to any episode of The Real Housewives to see the claws come out and the fur fly. Yep, she’s that friend who has to be better than you at everything. She may even campaign vigorously to be the girlfriend everybody turns to for advice.
We all know a friend, sister, mom or co-worker who is struggling with competitive issues. And as difficult as it is to be around a Competitive Alpha, it’s even more painful to be one!
Although the inner validation we gain through competitive tactics may give us with a temporary sense of worth, the feeling never lasts. In order to sustain this false self-esteem, we must continually find and "beat" new opponents, thereby depleting our resources and leaving us in a perpetual state of dissatisfaction. Always chasing the next victory means we miss out on the very experiences that make life worth living.
Our hunger for recognition and approval can be so intense at times that it blinds us to the affects of our own behavior-- we can easily override common sense and social graces. It's not until we've lost the respect of our workmates or the loyalty of our friends that we grasp the true price for being so competitive. In other words, we realize that we may have won the battle, but we’ve lost the war!
To instantly shift from Alpha Bitch to Fierce and Feminine, and to receive the download of the book for free just go here: www.alphabitchbook.com
In the book, Taming Your Alpha Bitch: How to be Fierce and Feminine (and get everything you want!) Rebecca Grado and Christy Whitman call this gal a “Competitive Alpha”-- one of the four characteristics that define an Alpha Bitch.
When a Competitive Alpha perceives herself as being in the lead, she feels smug and energized. But when she finds herself coming up short next to her competitors, she is likely to become withdrawn or depressed or even lash out in a jealous rage. She also might find herself going into overdrive to out do and out perform her friends, co-workers, siblings, and neighbors.
Life for this woman is a perpetual game, and she is obsessed with keeping score. She has to prove that she is the best at everything, from the shape of her body to the size of her diamond ring. Only after she has made it clear that she's the one with the more successful husband, the bigger home, or the most perfect Downward Facing Dog pose does she feel content.
At work, her competitive drive comes out in full force. After all, business is one area that celebrates a competition. But when that tenacity turns into obsession, her fierce competitive nature may steer her straight off the cliff. That’s because she’s neither afraid of doing whatever it takes to advance, nor is she apologetic either. She can be ruthless and more destructive than beneficial.
Even in her intimate relationships, she may feel the need to outshine her partner. She’ll talk over him, finish telling his stories, and make sure that she gets the loudest laughs and the most attention. Rather than encouraging her partner or celebrating his victories, his successes quickly become fuel for her “out-do-him-at-all-costs” attitude.
As a mother, she will make certain that her children are front and center, all the time! And she just loves to constantly brag about her kids’ accomplishments to anyone who will listen—and to those who would rather not!
Among her friends, the Competitive Alpha’s behaviors are notorious. Just tune in to any episode of The Real Housewives to see the claws come out and the fur fly. Yep, she’s that friend who has to be better than you at everything. She may even campaign vigorously to be the girlfriend everybody turns to for advice.
We all know a friend, sister, mom or co-worker who is struggling with competitive issues. And as difficult as it is to be around a Competitive Alpha, it’s even more painful to be one!
Although the inner validation we gain through competitive tactics may give us with a temporary sense of worth, the feeling never lasts. In order to sustain this false self-esteem, we must continually find and "beat" new opponents, thereby depleting our resources and leaving us in a perpetual state of dissatisfaction. Always chasing the next victory means we miss out on the very experiences that make life worth living.
Our hunger for recognition and approval can be so intense at times that it blinds us to the affects of our own behavior-- we can easily override common sense and social graces. It's not until we've lost the respect of our workmates or the loyalty of our friends that we grasp the true price for being so competitive. In other words, we realize that we may have won the battle, but we’ve lost the war!
To instantly shift from Alpha Bitch to Fierce and Feminine, and to receive the download of the book for free just go here: www.alphabitchbook.com
No comments:
Post a Comment